Dear J,
This is for you.
What did you think about what I said? I know what you said your response was, but of course it was more turbulent than you can express... I didn't do it to taunt you, or just for the sake of continuing it on. There is an essence of truth to that statement, even now. How could I forget all that passed between us? Even with all that has happened since, you know that, I've spoken of that connection we still hold. I still feel it and in some ways I still care. In some ways I don't, because when I chose to cut ties, well, I found with you that I'm pretty good at it. But it's never been entirely without regrets.
And the argument "what goes around comes around" could be put to good use here, hey? That was the last thing I expected.
Don't think I never miss/ed you. There are still times when I remember little things. It will never ever be the same, even if you could forego your perfectly justified wariness, and even though sometimes I have wanted to. I won't let myself entertain such thoughts, to be honest, because things have changed. That friendship was one that I feel should be left in the past, just because it was a good thing, and I don't want the memory of that damaged. There is more to it, that is true. I'm not quite sure what those things are, though. I'm not sure I want to.
But that song, it brought you to mind for me, and sometimes it still does. It wasn't that long ago but we were so, so painfully innocent that it feels like another lifetime. I don't know that I can connect to who I was then, I can only look back as through a misted glass, but I somehow brought with me that connection between us up until now, and probably a while yet. And you know what?
It's not utterly, completely, wholly true now, and yet, in some ways, it still is.
Until the day I die.
Saturday, May 9, 2009
Letters to People IV
Wednesday, April 8, 2009
My Blogging Pet Peeves
Well, I think if you read my blog at all, you can quite easily see that I complain, a lot. I am not afraid to be far too verbose about it. Do I use "verbose" in the right context? Gosh, I hope so. I don't know why I just said that. Gosh, I mean.
So right now, I'm going to stop, take inventory, and tell all of you just what the hell irritates me when it comes to bloggers. Yes, I am here to spread cheer and goodwill, just like Santa. That is, like Santa if every kid had been bad and was getting coal... and a beating. On that joyous note, gather round, younglings.
1. Those who put up "captchas" for anyone who wishes to comment. It's irritating, and really, consider that it is to prevent spam. How often are you spammed on your blog in the comments? Not often, I'd dare to assume.
2. Those who selectively allow comments by others. While I do moderate comments, it is only because I hate getting notifications sent via email, and use this instead, although it does make for confusion at times. I will post any and all comments. Of course, if a comment is truly hurtful, then you have every right to delete it. But if it is merely someone disagreeing with you, leave it up. What are you, three?
3. Those who do not adjust the time on their blog. It's really not that hard.
4. While some people expect replies to comments they leave on posts, I'm not so fussed. It's pretty much courtesy, but that is at the blogger's discretion, particularly if a comment merely saying "lol" has been left. Come on, what suitable reply to that can even be made? That being said, if you are going to reply to some comments on a post, you should reply to everyone who has commented so far. You can at least refer to a couple of comments in one reply.
5. People who read and read your blog and never comment. Unless you don't want it to be known that you are reading said blog, then... that would make sense. I am guilty of this at times, since I follow almost too many blogs to keep up with. Or sometimes I'm just antisocial. Still, it is bad. Everyone loves comments. Spread the love.
6. Those who follow your blog simply because you follow theirs, when they don't have the slightest intention of ever reading yours, and are not interested at all. I'm following your blog because I like the content, not because I want more followers of my own. That's pathetic, and I wouldn't stop reading your blog because you don't read mine. I just prefer a more accurate portrait of who is interested in my blog. On that note, does anyone know if, with the new Google Friend Connect, it is possible to make someone "unfollow" your blog just by clicking, as you could previously do?
7. Blogspot bloggers who have removed the "Followers" option. It is the easiest way for us to receive updates to your blog. I do not use Google Reader, and chances are, if I can't follow your blog, unless I really love your blog (like Your Beard Is Good ;P He's really funny), I will not remember to check it regularly. Of course, if you don't use Blogspot, like Chris over at Surviving Myself, this doesn't apply.
8. Yeah nah that's all the bitching I can come up with for now. What can I say? I love you guys in the Blogosphere, you make my day. It is true, I spend my days thinking about what to blog about. When I reach a computer, there is nothing but emptiness in my skull. It sucks, but know that I try, for you, and only for you. (That's a lie. It's not really for you. But let's pretend, it makes this easier for everyone.) Just gonna put it out there - you guys make me laugh, smile, cry, think deeply, realise and learn so many things, and cheer me up when I'm down. You're amazing and I'm so glad to be a part of this, even though my blog sucks. Because, again, how many of my followers actually read my blog? I know for a fact that there are several who Numero Sechs. Yes, That was Spanish, I think, and then German. Fine, fine. Nummer Sechs. That's #6 to those of you who do not have the superior German skills I have... [/sarcasm]
And bloggers, I'm curious. When you access the blogosphere, do you read others' posts first and comment, or write your own posts first and then check out everyone else's? I can't even remember what I do, but I think I actually start reading others', begin my post, keep reading others' in between, finish mine, read others', and wait for comments and for other people to post... Yes, I have no life.
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