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Tuesday, February 10, 2009

"And who am I now?"

I think I'm becoming slightly like one of those people who I never wanted to be but was scared I would become...
You know, the kind who would sleep around because it's what random guys would want, and it would make them feel loved and needed for at least a short amount of time?
Except I have a lot more self respect.
I'm asking you, if I do become one of them, virtual-slap me and make me stop. I don't want to be like that.

In other news, I have just learned some rather disturbing information here. Check it out. It's important that you know this. ;P No, really.

We had school photos yesterday. It wasn't quite as fun as I said over here, but where's the fun in writing that? And I did really use that much hairspray... My hair was immovable... which disturbs me a little. But, if truth be told, I have some strange fascination with using spray cans... >;D

I was about to rename my blog "Through the Looking Glass", or "Through my Looking Glass", but the latter could be taken by some as sexual innuendo... yes, it could. Which is not something I'm really keen for haha.

I'm very distracted and all my thoughts are over the place at the moment, so I may produce something actually worth reading later. For now, I aim to revamp my blog (:


P.S. here are some pictures of me, when I decide to pose, wear eye make up, and give myself big hair aha. It's for another blog kay? ;P I'd actually be way too embarrassed to post them on MySpazz or Failbook at all... AND with the last picture, even as big as it gets, you can't really make out my scars on my forearm, it just looks a bit fuzzy. C:

Yes, a typical MySpazz shot

Not that I'm ashamed of my scars, don't think that. I'm not proud of them either. But they're part of my past, and they tell a story. And it's something that will stay with me, not just physically. I don't feel the need to hide them, except to avoid making others' uncomfortable, and also especially at school, where so many would call me "emo". I don't want that. I don't blame them, I get it, but that's not what it's about for me. And I don't want to get shit about it, thanks. So I do hide them for the most part in public.

That's all ;)

[update on the Cameron situation] OOPS OOPS OOPS (I did it again). Cameron just texted me asking if I wanted to go to the movies with him on Saturday. That wouldn't be sooo bad. Until. You realise. That Saturday just so happens to be Valentine's Day. MAJOR OH N03S... I am otherwise occupied, I'm having a Star Wars / anime movie marathon during the day with my friend Nick. We are just friends and would never be anything more. Trust me. So I told him I was hanging out with a friend all day. He replied as I am writing this to ask if I am free for movies any other day. Considering I was caught not being with who I said I was with the other day and my parents are strict on who I go out with (no going out just one on one with a boy haha), I'm not too keen to repeat that anytime soon. Which I told him. He knows it's Valentine's Day, it's not just coincidence, because he wrote back to that saying "Okay have a good V day on Saturday". AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. No. How do I get myself into these situations? Okay, okay, I know how. I explained it in the post before last.

BUT OOPS. I feel so bad. Why? I just want to be friends with him. Friends. And not hook up friends either. Just friends. Help lol.


  1. Hi!
    Your blog name already sound good to me.
    See you around.

  2. You are beautiful.

    In every sense of the word.....you are b~e~a~u~t~i~f~u~l.

    Steady On
    Reggie Girl