Just putting it out there (I'm a lot calmer right now, than I was before. But still) -

I never thought it was possible to miss anyone this much while they were still alive.

I never thought I'd need to miss the people in question, in this way.

I never thought there would be a time when I would see them and not talk to them, not smile and be happy to see them, not call out to them.

I never ever thought that such a day could come. And I never ever ever thought it could last.

This began on the 10th of September, 2008. That's six months, people. Tell me there is an end date for this nightmare. I'm not exaggerating, that's what it is, to me.

Although, I know I don't get to wake up. This is reality, and let's face it, reality is shit.

I hope you guys are as happy as you seem to be, but I gotta admit, I really, really hope that you miss me just a little too, every so often. Please tell me that it meant as much to you as it did, and does, to me.

And, although I talk about him more, which is why he was dubbed the "ex best friend", and also because I've given up any hope of reconciliation, to be honest the others are the ones who matter more. Because that was there before him, and it was meant to last after, as well.