Something Kate wrote in response to my last blog has completely shocked me. The idea of it, !!!!!!!!!!
"I hope that all the memories make you smile someday and that when you are old and grey, you can sit there and wonder, "what was it that made it so special?" and not be able to remember why it ended at all.
that sounds mean, because I know you don't want to forget. But I don't like to see you in so much pain."
Lol. I get what she means, I think. But like, !!
I am astounded beyond words hah.
See personally I hope that I will soon be at a stage where not everything reminds me of Jake, but the things that do, I will just be able to remember them happily, as a good memory, something in the past and not to happen again, and leave it at that. Unless that is what she is saying because I'm not sure I could take it one of two ways.
I want to sleep at nights.
And personally, of course, my greatest most slimmest hope that I won't even allow to exist but it still flickers there faintly, is that he will have a change of heart.